A year or so ago I shared on Facebook a sweet conversation with Rae that I cherished. I want to share it here so that it's preserved and serves as a reminder to myself and hopefully it can help someone else. It went something like this..
Rae: 'Mom, why doesn't everyone like me? There is a girl as school that is so popular. Everyone likes her. Not everyone likes me.'
Me: 'What does everyone like about her?'
Rae: 'She can run fast, do the splits and she has shiny hair.'
Me: 'Well... (after holding my giggles about the above comment) Rae, it's like ice cream. Some people are vanilla. Everyone likes them. They blend with every flavor they are paired with. They are nice and no one hates vanilla ice cream. But some of us are rocky road.'
Rae: 'I LOVE rocky road!'
Me: 'Me too! But not everyone likes rocky road. But the people that like it.. well they LOVE it! It's probably their favorite flavor of ice cream.'
Rae: 'Hmm...'
Me: 'You and I darling, are rocky road. Not everyone will just like you.. but those that do will be madly in LOVE with you.
Rae: 'I am pretty sure your mint chocolate chip'
Me: 'I think your right.. and I am happy to not just be vanilla.'
Rae: 'Me too!'
I felt at the time like I had earned some momma brownie points with my quick on my feet answer. Well since that proud momma moment I have realized that maybe I am the in need of the advice more then Rae has ever been.
We all get criticized, we all have people that do not prefer our type of personality, our outlook on the world or maybe they just don't like our face. I have been struggling with feeling down on myself because not everyone likes me, not everyone wants to be around all this mintiness. I have a strong personality. I may be too honest. But I also know that I would do anything to help someone and that my heart is usually in the right place. I also know I can't pretend to be a vanilla. I can't change my personality. Frankly, I am just too opinionated and a little too excitable to be a vanilla.
Lately I find myself repeating in my head 'Just be your crazy chocolate chip self, the right people will LOVE you.' and now I will add 'Don't stay where you are tolerated. Go where you are celebrated!' my list of mantras.
Here's to the rocky roads, mint chocolate chips and the pistachios of the world. May you find the people that LOVE you for all those things that make you unique and think your the best flavor on earth!
So.. what flavor are you?
LOVE,
Nikki
I loved this the first time I heard it, and again now. I feel a kinship to you, that we are both adventurous entrepreneurial Mommas, raising deliciously vibrant and unique kids while juggling a 'dream' business (that's more work than we bargained for), and balancing a marriage and housework in between. Parallel lives!
ReplyDeleteI'm totally there with you on the personality thing, I can be too much for some people. I'm probably a mocha java with dark chocolate chunks.... sweet and creamy at first but with a KICK once I get going, and some mature, serious chunks in there to slow me down. ;)
P.S. I love your personality. We just have to stay true to ourselves and look for others who are dreamers (as our tribe) to support us when others can't. As far as the new quote: Most of my family (immediate family of hubby and kids excluded) didn't want me to launch my business, and I was disappointed, but sought the help, wisdom, and support of others who did believe in me and what I was doing. I'm not going to say I'm still not disappointed by their lack of confidence in my vision, but I do know that in the end it didn't stop me.
I feel a kinship to you too Sarah! It takes a strong personality to do what we do. Not everyone likes a strong personality!
DeleteMik didn't really have issues with me starting a business, but I think he still under estimates how hard I work. He seems to think I can take off whenever I want and that my job is low stress.
Keep going.. you are making a huge difference in the lives of children! My art teacher in 5th grade was who showed me I might have some talent!
I remember when you posted this last year! I LOVE your response!
ReplyDeleteI am mint cookies and cream. Not very many people know you exist, but once they find you, they are hooked for life! :)
Holli.. I love that response!
DeleteI am cherry chocolate chip....with some pecans (NUTS!) thrown in there! Sweet, fun-loving cherries, with a little bit of DARK chocolate for balance...and definitely the NUTS. Served in a glass bowl, with a REAL spoon. (That is the CONTROLLING part!) Some love me...some do not. I'm ok with that. :0 )
ReplyDeleteAnd I do LOVE you just the way you are, too! YOU-nique!
Anna - you are so sweet... and I love that you are a little nutty, like me!
DeleteI think your answer was spot on. I am a late bloomer in this crafty life and a lot see it as a cute hobby. It's an expression of me. Some don't get it. My mantra....Surround yourself with a few really good friends who "get" you than a bunch of aquaintances. You are doing just fine, momma!
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